[Cast your burden on the Lord]

This isn’t what I intended on posting today.  I’m winging it here. 

Yesterday was a melt down sort of day. It felt dark. It felt hopeless.  I know these feelings aren’t accurate, but when you’re feeling as if you’ve reached the end of your rope, and you’re struggling to hang on, you can feel quite forgotten. I know this isn’t accurate either.  

These are the moments I find the most difficult to share. I don’t enjoy sharing the despairing.

The Psalmists, however, laid it all out there.  They lamented their restlessness. They held nothing back.  They we’re winging it too, however, they knew that their God was with them, so they called out to Him.

“Give ear to my prayer, O God, and hide not Yourself from my plea for mercy! Attend to me, and answer me; I am restless in my complaint and I moan,” –Psalm 55:1-2

Though I hate to admit it, that’s where I was yesterday. Why is it so difficult to be weak?  Why is it so hard for me to let go?  I felt needy yesterday.  

I hate feeling needy. I hate being vulnerable.  I was clinging to Andrew.  I needed him close.  I asked for a pep talk.  (This caught him by surprise. He thought it was funny.) I’d put him on the spot, but I REALLY needed one! However, he didn’t know what to tell me.  He was feeling as lost as I was.  I asked him if he’d pray for me, so he did.

“And I say, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away and be at rest; yes, I would wander far away; I would lodge in the wilderness;  I would hurry to find a shelter from the raging wind and tempest.” –Psalm 55:6-8

Do you know where the saying “On a wing and a prayer” comes from? (I didn’t.) Apparently it’s a phrase that was used in World War II when pilots would land planes on a wing and a prayer. Songwriters Harold Adamson and Jimmie McHugh took up the phrase in their WWII song “Coming in on a wing and a Prayer.” It tells the story of a damaged airplane, barely able to limp back to base.  [Source: Ascensionpress.com]

I’ve been feeling this way too.  I started this Season with excitement.  Metaphorically I was leaping, but I’ve come back limping as well. I guess I’m in good company.  Others who’ve gone before me came back limping (Genesis 32:24-31 ), but Jacob received His blessing.

Coming In On A Wing And A Prayer

One of our planes was missing
Two hours overdue
One of our planes was missing
With all its gallant crew
The radio sets were humming
We waited for a word
Then a noise broke
Through the humming and this is what we heard

Comin’ in on a wing and a prayer
Comin’ in on a wing and a prayer
Though there’s one motor gone
We can still carry on
Comin’ in on a wing and a prayer

What a show, what a fight, boys
We really hit our target for tonight
How we sing as we limp through the air
Look below, there’s our field over there
With just one motor gone
We can still carry on
Comin’ in on a wing and a prayer

Holding on Tight

After spending some time holding tight to one another, I asked Andrew if he’d listen to a sermon with me.  He agreed to this.  I’d also emailed him some music, so we listened to a few of those songs, and then our sermon.

Afterwards we listened to the rest of the music.  We sang “Praise You in This Storm” and “The Voice of Truth” (both by Casting Crowns).  Andrew turned to me at some point with tears in His eyes and said, “He just said, ‘This is one of those times you’ll look back on fondly.’”  

Then Andrew said to me, “It was a brutal day, but it lead to a beautiful night.”  I was teary too.  It was a beautiful night, and God’s words were comforting words.  I’m still holding on to His promises, and I know that He won’t forget our blessing.

Jacob wasn’t the only one who asked for a blessing and received it.  Jabez too asked God to expand his territory. (1 Chronicles 4:10)

There was also this gal who had had a discharge of blood for 12 years.  She was living life on a wing and a prayer.  She had suffered a fair amount under many physicians.  She’d spent all that she had, and her health wasn’t getting any better.  In fact, it was growing worse.  She’d heard the news about Jesus, so she came up behind Him in the crowd and touched His garment. (Mark 5:24-27)

“For she said, “If I touch even His garments, I will be made well.” And immediately the flow of blood dried up, and she felt in her body that she was healed of her disease.” –Mark 5:28-29

I can relate to this gal, so I’m sure you’ll understand why I’m shedding some tears as I write this.  I spoke some of these same words to Andrew: I keep getting worse. Things aren’t getting better. They’re getting worse. We don’t have any money to spare either. We’ve both been through seeing specialists, gone through the blood work, and tried alternative medications.  

Jesus is our only answer as well. I haven’t given up on miracles, so I’m reaching for His garment. I’m still very intent on trusting that we’ll rise, and go out leaping once again.

“But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its rays. And you will go out and frolic like well-fed calves.” –Malachi 4:2

“But I call to God, and the Lord will save me. Evening and morning and at noon I utter my complaint and moan, and He hears my voice.” –Psalm 55:16-17

“Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved.” –Psalm 55:22

Next—> Pride Goes Before the Free Fall

If you’re interested in reading more from this series, all entries can be found here . And the first entry can be found right here: Flying Lessons

 

19 thoughts on “On Wings and Prayers

  1. Praying for you Tina. God is faithful and he is always with you. It’s okay to have days where we’re limping instead of leaping. It’s those days that make us stronger and more faithful and trusting of our loving God. 💜

    1. Thank you. ❤ I'm feeling like an insecure mess right now. I've been such a yo-yo these last couple of years. My self-esteem is taking a good beating, and I'm starting to understand why some people feel the need to hide, because I'm starting to feel like I want to crawl under a rock myself. Ughh… How are you doing!!!???

      1. Oh Tina I am so sorry to hear that. Do you do a devotional or anything? Maybe something specific for how your feeling to help lift you up? I will be praying for you girl!

        I am doing good 🙂 exhausted which is why I haven’t written or been on here much. 13 weeks and going strong!

      2. Thank you so much Casey. I was experiencing some anxiety. Anxiety and depression can come and go with my health stuff. I am very in the word. I don’t read a devotional, but if I need to do that I do have a C.S. Lewis newsletter that I’ve signed up for that’s really good, and I have a friend on Facebook who writes devotionals that are very good. Actually, God used one of his devotionals recently. I had “Rejoice always” on my mind and I was thinking of studying up on that. When I signed into Facebook there was a devotional about rejoicing in Him. That’s the Lord for ya! Always when you need encouragement and a reminder.

        Glad to hear you’re doing good! I can relate to the exhausted. That’s been the story of my life for many years now, but God is good. He’s using it for His purpose. Praying for you too. Take it easy Casey. ❤

  2. Good stuff!!! I know you weren’t feeling up to yourself with those initial thoughts but this post has come out as a result and it was beautiful to read…thanks so much for sharing your words and your heartfelt faith through those words..your trust in Him is an inspiration! When you said you needed Andrew’s encouragement that was sweet, I love to have nate do the same for me!!!

    1. Thank you. For some reason this Fall and Winter has been particularly difficult. I really need those pep talks. Sometimes Andrew will know just what to say, but he’s going through his own stuff too. He gets discouraged as well. We’re definitely understanding the whole “two are better than one..” We constantly have to pick each other back up. It’s just a tough Season. Seasons change. It’s not easy when you’re going through it, but God is good in every Season. I’m trying to remember what song that’s from. I know I just heard that through song recently. It’s true, He IS good in every Season. We just have to remember that, focus on that and sometimes even cling to it. He doesn’t change. He’s always faithful.

      It took me a bit to figure out what song that came from but I found it…”Counting Every Blessing” (Well of course.)

      1. Oh yes now I’ll have to be sure and listen to that song, thank you..I’m thinking I know which one it is …..
        And yes I’m so thankful God has created us for relationships, they’re a beautiful blessing!!!!!

  3. I actually haven’t read on wings and prayers yet…wanted to comment on unstoppable but there wasn’t a comment place?? Weird…
    Anyways great post (unstoppable) very important reminders and truths, love it!!

      1. I don’t what happened there, but when I went to check my settings the comment box wasn’t ticked. It’s ticked now. Thanks for letting me know. 🙂

    1. Thank you ❤ He IS faithful. Melt downs happen, but the Lord is good to comfort and remind us that hope is strill right in front of us and that He never leaves our side. Thanks so much for your prayers. ❤

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