[On the road again]
Andrew and I don’t get out too much due to our health conditions, but when we do, even a drive becomes a bit of an adventure to me. Andrew has Fibromyalgia and is on some pretty heavy duty painkillers for his pain. He also gets very fatigued, has to deal with insomnia, and feels nauseous quite often. (That’s the short version of the story.) All of that alone, makes getting out quite difficult.
I have an autoimmune disease, myself. It’s called Hashimoto’s Disease, and it affects the thyroid. (particularly how much thyroid hormone the body produces). Basically, your immune system goes haywire, and decides your own body is the enemy, thus my thyroid is continually under attack.) Hashimoto’s Disease has an endless list of symptoms (and sometimes that’s how it feels) I’ve been through it all (except for some reason I never had the weight gain, which is quite rare. I’ll take what I can get!) Fortunately, things have been getting better for me, (unfortunately, not so much for Andrew.) I’m trying out a new medication, which seems to be helping. God has guided us through our challenges, and both Andrew and I know that we have God’s promise of healing. It’s just a matter of His timing. So I’m looking forward to what waits up ahead, and I am dreaming big! (Oh, I am, I am! Green eggs and spam!) Now that I’ve got the basics of our story established, on with the journey!
It was a clear sunny day as we drove down the highway to our destination. We were both in good spirits, and the radio was on. Have I mentioned I’m a singer? (Well, not professionally, or publicly, with the exception of church, but then my voice sort of gets lost in the crowd.) So, yep, I’m a singer! (Ha ha!) December had just begun, so Christmas music was playing and Andrew was getting a personal one women carolling session. My voice was busy, and my eyes were too–searching the skies for what perchance I might see–be it planes, birds, or even sometimes I’ve spied hot air balloons! When I spotted an eagle, I happily called out, “There’s my eagle!,” and not long after, Andrew spotted one as well, through the windshield of our vehicle, and echoed my sentiment with, “There’s your eagle!”
Being that the day was so bright and clear, the mountains that formed the backdrop of this scene stood boldly beside us as we drove. Their snowy peaks were so beautiful, and a mass of low lying clouds created an almost misty look at their base. It was so breathtakingly gorgeous that I had to exclaim, “Look at those mountains!” Andrew’s response to me was, “I can’t–I’m driving.” Before you think ‘well that sounds like a typical grumpy man,’ he really wasn’t being grumpy, it just sounded that way. He was being sensible, and his words actually caught my attention. I suddenly found that my perspective of those dreaded metaphorical mountains were changing in that instance.
I’ve always hated those “mountains” They look so daunting. If you stare at them too long, a “mountain” soon becomes an immovable and ever so discouraging wall. There have been times in my life when I’ve felt them looming, and I kept looking at them so cynically. That’s just it, our perspective gets skewed, and hope gets lost in the struggle. If instead we believed that those “mountains” would be made low we could excitedly say, “Look at those Mountains!” while we continued driving.
After Andrew’s doctor’s visit we were back on the road again, and since we were in the neighborhood we decided to stop in and visit with our brother-in-law Paul, hard at work. (He owns his own company! He does, he does, are ya feelin’ the love!?) I’d forgotten that our niece’s husband Dave (who we’ve always seen more as a brother), was presently working with Paul as well. It was a pleasant surprise to see him, and it was a blessing to have the opportunity to visit with them both.
What more could I ask for in a day. I had my God, my family, my sunshine, my eagle, my music, and a road trip! The journey home again, drew my eyes once more out the window, towards those mountains views. The clouds had risen so high that I could hardly see those glorious mountains anymore. (Yeah, that right there, said it all to me.) Those mountains just aren’t bigger than my God–and my faith. Even just a little of it can bring those mountains down.
❤ ❤ ❤
Not too long after I wrote this (just under a month) I found myself looking at those “mountains” again, but I wasn’t looking at them as if they were glorious. I was feeling quite frazzled, truth be told. I knew there was something so wonderful waiting on the other side of them. I didn’t doubt this, and I wasn’t doubting that I’d reach my destination (I have too much drive and determination), but I was feeling so bogged down and overwhelmed. So I was praying, and crying, and praying, and crying some more (It’s just what I do), when God answered me with, “Sit back and enjoy the view. You’re not driving–I am.” (Oh, that’s right!) I had it wrong. I thought I was the one who had to keep on driving. It wasn’t that I had to keep driving to make those mountains disappear. He’s been driving all along. (He’s in control–not I. Not I, not I! Just look at that sky!) I can just enjoy the view, as God makes those mountains disappear from view. I needed that reminder, that correction, and that reassurance. Once again, He never fails to meet the need.
For more inspiration please take a look at my poem titled ” Mountain ” <—-(right there.) I wrote this particular poem during another season of my life, when I was looking at those mountains all wrong. I was too focused on what I thought I lacked. I was feeling so broken, and so damaged that I was unable to see that there was so much more ahead of me. Yes, I’ve had my struggles, but I’ve also grown closer to God because of those struggles. To me, those struggles just disappear behind me, and are left in the past where they belong. If I look back it’ll only be to see how far God has brought me. Mountains change, and they shrink. They fade even, in the distance. It’s okay if you find yourself looking at those mountains, just keep in mind Who it is, that’s doing the driving. It’s also okay to stop and ask for directions.
If this wasn’t enough to beat those mountains into submission (Um, the only sort of beating, and object that deserves a metephorical beating, that I would even suggest), here’s some music that speaks also: Mountains